How did it all get going?

From Mistress Alice

Alice in weird land

We’ve had an early start today and been and done our walk and sight seeing, a lovely lunch and now it is a bit of a relax.

Mick has been directed to do a bit of research for changes to outfits but I’m sure he will tell you about that himself – he seems to be tapping away on the his tablet at the moment so I’m not sure if he is contacting people or drafting his post to the blog.

so how did we get to where we are, we have explained why we did it but how did this FLR relationship come into it’s current form and how did we get it to work?

Our relationship was becoming a series of arguments and clashing of heads in 2001, Mick’s work frustrations and stress and my frustrations with life.  when Mick had his breakdown the air cleared and we had a really good heart to heart.

Our sex life had been very adventurous (for us at the time) and we both had done a bit of role play, bit of crossdressing and fetish play.  we had some a bit of Dom/sub playing (and that was what it was – playing) each taking turns to be the Dom.  The two surprises what that I really enjoyed the power trip and the feelings that it gave me and the other was that Mick struggled to take on the role – surprising as he was definitely an Alpha male in his work environment.  Mick was far more comfortable when he was in the submissive role.

during our Heart to Heart Mick explained that he hated the arguments but he was just losing control of work and life, but he didn’t want to lose me.  he wanted me to be his focus and as we talked we discussed how he would manage his work and how we would have to adjust our lives.  So the seeds were sown where I would become the Alpha in the relationship and Mick the submissive, Mick would finish his current contract and move to the consulting side of the industry – all of this just didn’t happen but took almost 9 months of talking, trying things, talking again and learning.

in the past we had both read a magazine called FORUM, (bear in mind this was 2001 and the internet was not the mine of information that it is now) and I went back through some old copies that we still had and read some of the articles and stories – some were clearly just that – Stories, but I did get some ideas.  On my next trip to London I went and picked up a current copy of FORUM and also called into a shop that I had visited with Mick before – Honour (near Waterloo Station) and picked up a couple of other magazines hoping to get some more ideas.

in the back of most of these publications there would be  adverts for Mistress and contacts but you would also get personal ads.  In one I found personal ad from a Dominant Wife with a submissive sissy who was looking to develop his training.  while this wasn’t what I wanted it did offer a potential insight to what/ where I wanted to travel.

That evening I wrote (pen and paper were still in fashion at this point) asking the Wife if she could give me some pointers and advice so that I could develop the relationship with Mick.  I posted it to the PO Box number with the vain hope that it might get a response – my hopes at this point were not high.

2 weeks later I came home to a letter, neatly written, from a lady that referred to herself as Mistress Carol, it was polite but blunt warning me that if I was a male thrill seeker then I could piss off, but if I was a fledgling Dom I should write again with more details. we corresponded for a about 6 weeks by post and then I was asked to provide a phone number and times when I would be in preferably when Mick was not.

Mistress Carol called about a week after the letter had been posted and our relationship started to take off.  we would chat twice a week, me with questions and Carol with advice (she had dropped the Mistress title once she realised that I was genuine and wanted help and guidance).  3 months after starting all of this correspondence and calls it was decided that we should meet and So Mistress Carol became my mentor on the way to becoming Mistress Alice.

Carol was a woman in her early 40s, she had been widowed in her 20’s after a car accident that almost killed her but took her husband.  She had been working part time and slightly struggling to make ends meet and had been asked by a friend if she would like earn a bit of money helping her friend who was doing some Domination work, the way Carol explains it is far more interesting but it gave her and real insight to the scene and also an understanding about the different elements of Domination and Submission.  Carol can explain the difference between the 2 hour whipping session with a paying client and a lifestyle choice.  while it provided her work it also meant that she was invited out into the fetish scene in London over the years she had a number of relationships but she found that she had a thing for submissive sissies and that is were she met her sissy Kerri, at that point called Kevin (Kerri is far cuter that Kevin).  Kevin is 18 years her junior.  When I first met Carol she had married Kerri 2 years previously and she had trained him to be her submissive sissy.

Carol spent the weekend explaining a lot of the basics and fundimentals and it was great to meet Kerri and see what could be done.

The biggest take away from the meeting was that there is a difference with Dom Sub play and a FLR.  Carol was working/ playing in the Dominatrix world but had a FLR as part of her home life.  she had reduced her Dom work and was wanting to do a bit more with her sissy to get that home life where she wanted it.

She was quite upfront with me, she would help me, explain things to me  – show me where appropriate. but I would also be required to help with her development of Kerri.

Over the next 12 months I learned a lot about the emotional side of FLR and how not to mess it up, how to understand the needs of the submissive are really, really important – often more important that those of the Dominant.  it allowed me to get our relationship right with Mick and to create sissy billie.

Carol also helped to train billie, this was introduced about 12 months into our FLR.  when we started with Chastity (about 2005) we both took billie and Kerrie to London to purchase their cages together and both Carol and I are the secondary Keyholders for each others sissy.

We are very good friends and regularly meet up to play and for vanilla get togethers.  billie will at least twice a year be sent back to Mistress Carol for refresher training – almost like a Quality Assurance process to ensure that he/she is still suitably submissive and still can maintain the appropriate standards as a sissy maid and servant to her Mistress.  while billie dreads his training assessments I do think he enjoys meeting with sissy kerri as they are “very” good friends.  I’m sure we’ll discuss that further later.

well that’s enough for now, time to have a cup of tea and get ready for this evening.

 

 

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One thought on “How did it all get going?

  1. This is really interesting. Thank you for being so open and sharing that part of your life. I am sure others who are thinking about FLR will learn a lot from it 😊

    Like

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